Firebid Boot

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First topic message reminder :

Well time for some serious boot camp. Please enter Firebid so we can begin

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Fri Jun 12, 2015 8:10 pm

I am afraid you have failed to meet the requirements. Please work on the grammar.

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Fri Jun 12, 2015 10:37 pm

Hey, Alina how are you doing today? " Fran exclaims excited to Alina !

"Hey, Fran what are you so excited about? " Alina asks Fran.

"Oh nothing, I just won two tickets to my favorite boy group and I want to take you with me! " Fran shouts in excitement.

"No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you" Alina shouts at Fran with anger.

"Aww, but it's going to not be fun without you please come with me pretty please" Fran begs to Alina on her knees.

"No, I'm not going that is final" Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger.

"Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend" Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she gets to her bedroom, she slams her door shut in anger because of Alina.

"Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying.

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Thu Jun 25, 2015 12:34 am

We're sorry for a delay in our replies, some stuff have been going on and we deeply apologize for leaving you hanging.

Quote :: Hey, Alina how are you doing today? " Fran exclaims excited to Alina !

Please add " before the word "Hey" and remove the comma after the word "Hey". Also, you placed a question mark but you said Fran exclaimed, and that is wrong. Please change the question mark into an exclamation mark.

Quote :: "No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you" Alina shouts at Fran with anger.

Please add a period after the words "with you".

Quote :: "Aww, but it's going to not be fun without you please come with me pretty please" Fran begs to Alina on her knees.

Please add a period after the words "pretty please".

Quote :: "No, I'm not going that is final" Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger.

Please add a period after the word "final".

Quote :: "Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend" Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she gets to her bedroom, she slams her door shut in anger because of Alina.

Please change the word "gets" into "got". "Please changed the word "slams" into "slammed".

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Thu Jun 25, 2015 2:38 am

it's good i have been busy with other things too your good

"Hey, Alina how are you doing today? " Fran exclaims excited to Alina !

"Hey, Fran what are you so excited about? " Alina asks Fran.

"Oh nothing, I just won two tickets to my favorite boy group and I want to take you with me! " Fran shouts in excitement.

"No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going "with you" Alina shouts at Fran with anger.

"Aww, but it's going to not be fun without you please come with me "pretty please" Fran begs to Alina on her knees.

"No, I'm not going that is "final" Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger.

"Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend" Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she got to her bedroom, she slammed her door shut in anger because of Alina.

"Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying.

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Fri Jun 26, 2015 1:17 am

Hey, Alina how are you doing today? " Fran exclaims excited to Alina !

"Hey, Fran what are you so excited about? " Alina asks annoyed by Fran.

"Oh nothing, I just won two tickets to my favorite boy group and I want to take you with me! " Fran shouts in excitement.

"No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you" Alina shouts at Fran with anger!

"Aww, but it's not going to be fun without you come with me pretty please. Fran begs to Alina on her knees!"

"No, I'm not going that is final" Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger!

"Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend" Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she got to her bedroom, she slammed her door shut in anger because of Alina!

"Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying!

oh sorry please delete the first one

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Sun Jun 28, 2015 8:26 am

Quote :: Hey, Alina how are you doing today? " Fran exclaims excited to Alina !

Please add a " before the word Hey and please remove the comma after the word Hey. Please replace the ? with an !

Quote :: "No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you" Alina shouts at Fran with anger!

Please add a period after the word "you".

Quote :: "Aww, but it's not going to be fun without you come with me pretty please. Fran begs to Alina on her knees!"

Please add a " after the word please. Please remove the very last ".

Quote :: "No, I'm not going that is final" Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger!

Please add a period after the word "final".

Quote :: "Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend" Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she got to her bedroom, she slammed her door shut in anger because of Alina!

Please add a period after the word "friend".

Quote :: "Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying!

Please remove the very last ! into a period .

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Sun Jun 28, 2015 9:01 am

"Hey Alina how are you doing today?" Fran exclaims excited to Alina

"Hey Fran what are you so excited about?" Alina asks annoyed by Fran.

"Oh nothing I just won two tickets to my favorite boy group and I want to take you with me! " Fran shouts in excitement.

"No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you." Alina shouts at Fran with anger!

"Aww, but it's not going to be fun without you come with me pretty please." Fran begs to Alina on her knees!

"No, I'm not going that is final." Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger!

"Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend." Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she got to her bedroom, she slammed her door shut in anger because of Alina!

"Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Sun Jun 28, 2015 10:14 am

Quote :: "No, I'm not going forget it Fran I'm not going with you." Alina shouts at Fran with anger!

Please add a period after the words "forget it".

Quote :: "Aww, but it's not going to be fun without you come with me pretty please." Fran begs to Alina on her knees!

Please add a ; after the word "you".

EDIT: Fixing word sizes

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Sun Jun 28, 2015 10:33 am

"Hey Alina how are you doing today?" Fran exclaims excited to Alina

"Hey Fran what are you so excited about?" Alina asks annoyed by Fran.

"Oh nothing I just won two tickets to my favorite boy group and I want to take you with me! " Fran shouts in excitement.

"No, I'm not going forget it. Fran I'm not going with you." Alina shouts at Fran with anger!

"Aww, but it's not going to be fun without you; come with me pretty please." Fran begs to Alina on her knees!

"No, I'm not going that is final." Alina screams, getting more angry as her face turns red from all the anger!

"Fine, then I'm not going at all I just wanted to have fun with you my best friend." Fran yells at Alina, running away with tears running down her face. When she got to her bedroom, she slammed her door shut in anger because of Alina!

"Oh Fran, I just don't like them." Alina thinks to herself and went to her and Fran's room, upset with Fran. Alina turns on some music to drown out Fran's crying

Subject: Re: Firebid Boot Sun Jun 28, 2015 10:49 am

All right, please now await for Kyra's response.

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